The Top 10 Reasons Why It Sucks To Be A Dick

  1. Everytime you get excited, you throw up!
  2. Your scalp gets cut off if you're Jewish.
  3. Your best friend is a pussy.
  4. Your closest neighbor is an asshole.
  5. You always hang around with 2 nuts.
  6. You never get a haircut.
  7. You shrink in cold water.
  8. Your head is disproportionate to the rest of your body.
  9. Your master strangles you all the time.
  10. You've got a hole in your head.